Theory of the Other

Abstract

That which we think about the people around us constitutes what in psychology is known as “Theory of the Other”. Lived experiences, our way of feeling, how we have been brought up, the moral values we share with our reference groups, among other factors, shape the image of “the other”, our anticipation of their intentions and how they may react. We construct something akin to an “archive” of possibilities and purposes that adapts to each individual and situation.
In the clinical setting: “What does this patient want or seek from me today? What are their expectations and needs?” Such questions underlie all types of human interaction, because our brain has adapted over generations to the dangers of the environment. It is another matter whether we are aware of –or bring into conscious awareness– the dizzying succession of emotions and feelings that arise during an interview or a meeting with friends. Most likely, we allow ourselves to be carried along by intuitions or established rituals.
Something tells us that we ought not to sign a preliminary purchase agreement because we detect dishonesty in the seller. Yet we sign because it's the ritual. A person accustomed to cognitive flexibility would have paid attention to their hunch and, before signing, would have asked whether there was sufficient basis for their suspicions and what degree of freedom they had to postpone signing.
Moreover, the “Theory of Myself” leads us to life scripts. Understanding them enables the professional to propose empowerment strategies to the patient.